 Family Life
The Family Journey
Celebrating as Families
Celebrations have always been an important part of family and
community life. Although most of our celebrations and holidays have gradually
changed since their historical beginnings, their purpose has not. As always, the
pageantry, ritual, and symbolism of celebrations help us to unite, motivate, and
educate. For parents, this makes celebrations ideal tools for building family
strengths and teaching family values. Research continues to find that families
who celebrate together are healthier and better able to meet the challenges of
modern day living.
Celebrations unite us. Whether it's the presentation of
Olympic gold, a backyard birthday barbecue, or handing out diplomas at a high
school graduation, celebrations unite us. They allow us to share in the
successes of people we care about. They bind us to our friends, families, and
communities. As human beings we have a deep need to belong, or be a part of
something larger than ourselves. We come together as couples, friends,
classmates, colleagues, teams, communities and families. As members of these
social groups, we adopt the rules and values of the groups that promote
cooperation and connect us together.
Individuals and families who are not well connected to their
communities and one another are at greater risk for depression, suicide,
delinquency and criminal behavior. On the other hand, youth who feel a part of
their communities are more likely to abide by the community's laws and
standards for behavior. Similarly, children who feel connected to their families
are more likely to live by the rules of the family.
A panel of family scholars recently noted that the rapid pace
and change of modern life have left many people feeling stressed, depressed, and isolated.
Some experts have suggested that traditions, rituals and celebrations are the
key to bringing continuity to our lives and connecting us to our past and
present.
Celebrations motivate us. Celebrations not only allow us to take
pride in past achievements, but they also rally confidence for the future. For
example, celebrating the promotion of a family member sends a message that the
person is deserving, worthy, and supported in his or her efforts - all of which
motivate the person to even greater achievements. Similarly, holidays such as
Thanksgiving or Independence Day can encourage us to be grateful for our
blessings or fight to maintain our freedoms.
It was during the gloomy hours of World War II when England was
at the brink of defeat, that Sir Winston Churchill rallied his countrymen by
reminding them of their strengths and by celebrating their accomplishments.
Nearly sixty years later, England still celebrates Churchill's rallying cry,
"We shall fight on the beaches. We shall fight on the landing grounds. We
shall fight in the fields, and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills. We
shall never surrender!" Perhaps as parents, we should rally our families
and move forward in united purpose. Reminding family members of past challenges
that have been overcome and providing encouragement to face new challenges can
help to both unite and strengthen families.
Celebrations educate us. One of the goals of our public
education system is to develop citizenship and patriotism in our youth. How is
it done? It's done by sharing patriotic stories, covering our hearts at flag
ceremonies, reciting the pledge of allegiance, and sharing the meaning behind
symbols of freedom such as the soaring eagle or the torch of liberty. Yet,
symbols and ceremonies are nothing until they are enriched with meaning. A flag
is only colorful fabric until one knows the stories behind it and the values it
represents. Then it becomes a tool that helps us cherish and pass on the
memories and values of our forefathers. We are stirred by our flag blowing in
the wind when they recall the final words of Patrick Henry: "Give me
liberty or give me death!" Or the words of our anthem, the Star-Spangled
Banner, as penned by Francis Scott Key as he anxiously awaited dawn's early
light so he could see if the flag was still flying over Fort McHenry.
Just as these National symbols and celebrations instill in us
and in future generations messages of courage, freedom and perseverance, so too,
family celebrations, stories and rituals teach lessons of character and values.
Celebrating a marriage anniversary teaches children of love, cooperation, and
commitment. It can open a discussion about the great lessons of relationships.
It reminds us of the vows taken during the wedding and inspires renewal. In
every celebration, there is a lesson.
Sharing family stories can help create heros, set standards for
behavior, or remind us of the happy moments we have shared together. By
enriching our daily lives and holidays with stories, symbols and rituals and
looking for opportunities to celebrate the accomplishments of each other, we can
unite and inspire our families.
Applications:
Here are ten ways to celebrate your family. Incorporate those
that make your family life better.
1. Write a family mission statement, motto, or creed.
2. Create a family flag or song.
3. Press your hand or footprints into that new slab of
cement you poured.
4. Have a family picnic or barbecue to acknowledge a
promotion, outstanding report cards, or other accomplishment.
5. Take pictures and develop a memory book of family events.
6. Keep a family journal.
7. Design a T-shirt logo and silkscreen them for the whole
family.
8. Hold a regular family activity night.
9. Interview the older members of your extended family and
ask them what they know about the family history.
10. Have memorable family meals on special occasions. For
example, having a candlelight dinner, lunch in the tree house, or a meal
that is dyed green in honor of St. Patrick's Day create can create
wonderful family memories.
Back to The Family Journey
|
